


you're my shooting star

by fairylock



Category: Infinite (Band)
Genre: Angst, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-02
Updated: 2015-09-02
Packaged: 2018-04-18 17:43:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,471
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4714733
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fairylock/pseuds/fairylock
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Myungsoo meets Sungyeol on a Friday. (Based on Michelle Branch's The Spirit Room album.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	you're my shooting star

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry it's been a while since I've posted something! This was, again, previously posted on livejournal and aff before so if it looks familiar then that's why lol. As stated in the summary, this is based on Michelle Branch's album The Spirit Room. If you haven't listened to it you reaaaaally should. :)

**i. you set me free**

 

Myungsoo meets Sungyeol on a Friday.

 

Myungsoo has the night shift at a clothing store in the mall and it’s just his luck, really, when someone dashes in two minutes before he was supposed to close up.

 

“I’m so sorry, I know you’re about to close, but I just need to buy one thing,” the someone blurts out from somewhere behind a clothing rack and Myungsoo blinks, wondering how the hell they got over there that fast.

 

He’s even more confused as a nice white button-up shirt is placed onto the counter and Myungsoo’s eyes travel up mile long legs to see a wide smile. “S-sure.” He clears his throat, finally realizing he was supposed to say something. He doesn’t know why but his face is flushing and this guy is actually _really_ attractive—

 

Myungsoo quickly shakes his head to clear it and he flashes a smile at the guy as he scans the item. “27,400 won, please,” he murmurs, reaching down to grab a bag and put the shirt in it.

 

A credit card is handed to him and Myungsoo can’t help but glance down at the name. Lee Sungyeol.

 

He swipes the card and slides it back to Sungyeol, who takes it and the bag. “Thank you so much, really,” Sungyeol replies with a wide smile. “I hope you have a great night!” he exclaims as he bounds out of the store, leaving a confused Myungsoo behind, who only knows that he wants to see this Lee Sungyeol again.

  
  
  
  


**ii. you get me**

 

Three weeks pass until Myungsoo sees Sungyeol again. He has an off day from school and is spending it at the café right around the corner from his apartment, sitting at his normal table with a caramel macchiato in his hands.

 

He has a Literature paper due in five hours with six hundred more words left.

 

Myungsoo takes no notice of the door opening until he hears the name Sungyeol being exclaimed in a loud voice that he knows to be Woohyun’s and he looks up from his laptop screen to see the Lee Sungyeol from those weeks ago standing at the counter, leaning against it with that wide smile on his face.

 

How do they know each other? Myungsoo shakes his head to clear his thoughts because he needs to finish this damn paper—he’s known about it for a month and had only just started on it the day before yesterday. He thinks getting in his portfolio for Photography is a lot more important than some stupid essay on some English author and book he doesn’t care about.

 

“It’s you!”

 

Myungsoo’s head snaps up to see Sungyeol slide into the booth across from him, setting a cup down as he grins and Myungsoo swallows nervously. “Me?” It’s a dumb response, but he has no idea why Sungyeol is even bothering to sit with him.

 

“From the store a few weeks ago, right? I really am sorry about that, coming in at the last minute, but I had an interview the next morning and all of my clothes were dirty and it—was just a stupid move on my part,” Sungyeol rambles and Myungsoo’s lips quirk up in a small smile. It was kinda cute.

 

“It’s fine,” he replies.

 

Sungyeol keeps his smile and extends his hand. “Lee Sungyeol.” Myungsoo takes it, definitely not mentioning that he had already known his name because that would make him seem like a creep. (Which he swears he isn’t.)

 

“Kim Myungsoo.” He clears his throat and lets their hands drop.

 

Sungyeol laughs. “I think this is going to be the start of a beautiful friendship, Myungsoo-ssi,” he replies, and Myungsoo can only smile. He thinks so too.

  
  
  
  


**iii. everywhere**

Myungsoo believes he’s going insane. Ever since meeting Sungyeol at the café, they’ve hung out quite often. Sungyeol comes over to his apartment and Myungsoo goes over to his (his roommate is Woohyun, which explains them knowing each other), and soon enough, Sungyeol is the only thing on Myungsoo’s mind.

 

Finals are coming up and their chances to see each other lessen but even then, all Myungsoo can think about is Sungyeol. Sungyeol’s hair that he likes to run his fingers through sometimes, Sungyeol’s bright, beautiful eyes, Sungyeol’s beautiful hands, Sungyeol’s extremely long legs—

 

Myungsoo _knows_ he’s going insane. Whenever he’s in the same room as Sungyeol, he feels all weird. It’s like butterflies are swarming in his stomach and his hands get sweaty and clammy. He knows what that means but he doesn’t want to admit it.

 

(Myungsoo realizes he’s in love with Sungyeol on a Monday.)

  
  
  
  


**iv. sweet misery**

 

Sungyeol likes to get his hopes up, Myungsoo soon learns. He had blurted out his feelings on a night when they had just finished their exams and he had had a bit too much soju. He expected the worse, of course, but Sungyeol kissed him instead.

 

They aren’t official, or at least Myungsoo doesn’t think so, because whenever they’re out in public and Myungsoo tries to grab Sungyeol’s hand, Sungyeol pulls away. Myungsoo tries to hide how it hurts, since maybe Sungyeol’s just nervous. They’re both guys, they aren’t _supposed_ to feel this way, he’ll be more comfortable sooner or later.

 

It’s another drunken night (this time, Myungsoo’s twenty-first birthday) when Sungyeol says that he’s afraid. He loves Myungsoo, he really does, but he’s terrified.

 

“It’s...my parents would flip, I’d be lucky if they ever let me see Daeyeol again.” Sungyeol’s laugh is forced as he drowns another shot and Myungsoo wants to stop him, but he keeps silent, eyes glued onto the floor. “And our friends...” Sungyeol’s voice trails and he looks up. “We’re both guys, Myungsoo-yah. I’m sorry, but it’s...you know people don’t react too kindly to things like this. When we’re alone we can touch all we want, alright?” He smiles but it’s lopsided and his breath reeks of alcohol. “I’m... I don’t think I’m ready to do skinship in public, okay?” His tone sounds like he’s talking to a child and Myungsoo just nods, not knowing what to say.

 

Sungyeol passes out an hour later on the couch and Myungsoo moves him to his bed, brushing back Sungyeol’s hair and kissing his forehead. He knows Sungyeol will forget about this discussion in the morning.

  
  
  
  


**v. all you wanted**

 

Even so, Myungsoo obeys Sungyeol’s request and doesn’t touch him in public. If he gave Sungyeol a small hug or just put his hand on Sungyeol’s leg, Sungyeol would tense up and subtly try to push him away. It hurts, because he knows why Sungyeol is like this, but is it really so bad? Little touches every now and then won’t arouse any suspicion.

 

He keeps his hands to himself, however, and that should be a feat in itself, really. He had always been touchy-feely with people, it isn’t like him hanging off of Sungyeol was something new.

 

But he doesn’t want Sungyeol to leave him. They’ve been together for two years already, and Myungsoo wants them to last as long as possible.

 

He exhales sharply and stares beside him at the peacefully sleeping Sungyeol. It was almost one in the morning and he hasn’t been able to fall asleep.

 

He slowly reaches out a hand to brush Sungyeol’s hair out of his eyes but quickly jerks it back because Sungyeol was a light sleeper. He knows Sungyeol has an early morning class and doesn’t want to wake him  up.

 

He hates himself for it, but the one question lingering in his mind is _will I ever be good enough?_

__  
  
  
  


**vi. something to sleep to**

 

Sungyeol breaks up with him on a Thursday, a week after their third year anniversary.

 

Myungsoo’s busy looking at the pictures on his camera from his latest Photography class project when Sungyeol places the stuffed owl Myungsoo had won on their first date to the amusement park on the coffee table. Myungsoo’s head snaps up, tilting in confusion. “Yeol?” Myungsoo questions, a feeling of dread creeping up into his stomach.

 

“We’re over.” It’s only two words, but those words are simple enough to bring Myungsoo’s world crashing down.

 

His mouth opens and shuts so many times he probably looks like a fish out of water, but he settles with a “why?”, voice cracking at the end unexpectedly. He should have seen this coming.

 

“I met someone. A girl.” Sungyeol’s quick to add, nudging the stuffed animal forward with his fingers. “Her name is Hyemi. She’s beautiful. She’s smart and witty and....everything I want.” Sungyeol clears his throat, and Myungsoo can sense the uncertainty in his voice.

 

No, she’s a _girl_ , and that’s what you want because it’s _normal_ , Myungsoo wants to retort, but he hesitantly grabs the owl after he sets his camera down. “You can keep this, you know,” he says quietly.

 

Sungyeol shakes his head. “You won it. It’s yours,” he replies, biting his lower lip. “I don’t—I don’t hate you, Myungsoo-yah. Don’t get me wrong. I love you, I do, but...” He lets out a sigh. “This isn’t working.”

 

“Not working?” Myungsoo asks. “You won’t try, Sungyeol,” he snaps, anger suddenly getting the best of him. “You’ve never tried with us! It’s always been _me_! I've always done what you've asked of me and this is what I get?!”

 

Sungyeol manages a sad smile. “I haven't tried because you aren’t what I need. I’m sorry.” His voice softens and Myungsoo wants to throw the damn owl at him or punch him or something but he can’t because it’s _Sungyeol_ and he can never get mad at Sungyeol.

 

Myungsoo doesn’t say a word. He’s afraid if he does he’s going to cry and he hasn’t cried in years.

 

“Goodbye, Myungsoo,” Sungyeol replies, and just like that, he walks out of the apartment and out of Myungsoo’s life.

 

Myungsoo breaks down as soon as the door slams shut.

  
  
  
  


**vii. here with me**

 

Myungsoo keeps himself locked up in his apartment with that damned stuffed owl in his arms for the next two weeks. He has hope that Sungyeol will come knocking on his door, saying he was wrong and they’re meant for each other.

 

As the days pass, so does that hope. Sungyeol never calls him, never comes to his apartment. It’s as if they’d never even known each other and that’s what hurts Myungsoo the most.

 

His friends, Sungjong and Dongwoo, come to check on him every few days, leaving food on the table. They have no idea why he’s acting the way he is, but they give him enough ramen and kimchi to last him at least a month and Myungsoo doesn’t think he deserves such good friends. Maybe he never even deserved Sungyeol.

 

He wishes he knew where it had all gone wrong.

  
  
  
  


**viii. if only she knew**

 

Hyemi is, indeed, beautiful. She has long, dark hair and she’s tall enough to not have to stand on her tiptoes to kiss Sungyeol. It’s Myungsoo’s luck for that to be the first time he ever sees her (and Sungyeol, since the breakup), standing underneath a large oak tree in the campus courtyard.

 

There are books scattered around the two and Myungsoo hesitates, wanting nothing more than to storm up to Sungyeol and grab his shoulders, shake him and scream at him that _she’ll never love you like I do!_

 

Myungsoo wonders what Hyemi would think if she had known her boyfriend had just been dating a guy, and he’s tempted to tell her, to go up to her instead, but he walks on by, keeping his gaze fixated on the grass.

 

He doesn’t think anyone can ever love Sungyeol the way he does.

  
  
  
  


**ix. i’d rather be in love**

 

It’s been three months since Myungsoo has seen Sungyeol and three months since he’s realized Sungyeol isn’t coming back. Sungyeol isn’t going to show up at his apartment in the middle of the night, begging for forgiveness and showering his face with little kisses.

 

He wouldn’t protest to any of that, no matter how much he thinks otherwise.

 

Myungsoo buries himself into his schoolwork instead, something he never thought he would ever do, but it was the only way to take his mind off of Sungyeol. It’s the ultimate cliché, but he feels empty.

 

(Sungjong and Dongwoo never do figure out why he didn’t get out of his bed for two weeks straight and even though they often ask about what happened to Sungyeol, Myungsoo evades the subject and figures what they don’t know wouldn’t hurt them.)

  
  
  
  


**x. goodbye to you**

Myungsoo’s packing up the last of his apartment when a polaroid slips from his box labeled PICTURES, and he sets the box down to pick it up.

 

It was taken on his and Sungyeol’s first date at Lotte World. Sungyeol had protested going to the photobooth because it wasn’t like they were one of those sickeningly sweet couples, but one pout and a quick kiss to Sungyeol’s cheek made him change his mind.

 

Myungsoo had surprised Sungyeol with this one, wrapping his arms around Sungyeol as he pressed his lips to Sungyeol’s cheek again as soon as the timer sounded. Sungyeol had immediately protested, asking what if someone grabbed their pictures, but Myungsoo had just rolled his eyes and slung his arm around Sungyeol’s shoulders, grinning as the timer sounded again.

 

Myungsoo smiles slightly, running a finger down the edge of the picture as he sighs quietly. He’s learned it wouldn’t do him any good to linger on the past. Sungyeol had his own life and he had his, now.

 

He reaches down to put the picture back into its place, picking up the box.

 

He glances behind him at the empty living room, eyes landing on the lone stuffed owl sitting in the middle of the floor. It's a bit worn out and dirty, but he knows there’s a kid out there somewhere that could enjoy it. It gives him too many memories he needs to leave behind.

 

“Goodbye, Sungyeol-ah,” he murmurs, walking out the door.

  
  
  
  


**xi. a drop in the ocean**

 

When Myungsoo thinks back on his relationship with Sungyeol, he no longer harbors any ill feelings towards Sungyeol. He thinks he’ll always be in love with him, no matter how little the feelings he has for him are.

 

Sungyeol married Hyemi two years after graduating university. Myungsoo had, surprisingly, been invited to the wedding, but he declined due to a previous engagement.

 

(It was a lie, but he couldn’t bring himself to go, no matter how hard he tried.)

 

If you asked him if he regretted ever meeting Sungyeol, his immediate answer would be no. They had their ups and downs, but so does everyone else.

 

He wouldn’t trade their years together for the world.

  
  



End file.
